Monday, August 31

Goodbye-s

I'm not a big fan of saying goodbyes, i'm more of a hello person.


I never thought u could just walk away and never look back to me.

A friend don't just walk out of their friends' life,
at least not on just a sepele reason.

I hated myself for a moment,
thinking that i'm such a jerky friend,
but when i think about it,
it's not a big deal.

I called, but u never picked up
I sms-ed,but u didn't reply
I've apologized,countlessly...

Well.at least I've done my part.
I've tried,
That's it!
I'm done!



If i can bury my past,i would have done it.

p/s: I'm full of anger and hatred that i feel bitter at this moment. Still, I manage to smile. But then,all i want to do right now is just run as far as i can,scream as loud as i want.

Monday, August 24

-.-"

I longed for the glorious moment of my life (haha - maybe wayyy back at M'sia)


but

somehow i miss that bitter,hateful time too

guess i'm not ready to give up things yet...

Saturday, August 22

Dia datang lagi :)

Here it comes..
Ramadhan al-Mubarak
selamat berpuasa!


How i wish we have a pasar ramadhan in Jogja...very very very much *sigh*

Monday, August 17

Brand New

So, my last writing was before i went back to Malaysia and now it's been a week since i came back to Jogja. No internet connection. That's the reason.
Time crawled so slow when i was back home till a week before my flight to Jogja, then it seemed like the acceleration is so fast that all i wanted to do was just to curl up in my bed at home. Spending every possible minute with my family.
I totally abandoned and ignored my cell phone at home. All I did is just play all day long with my little youngest brother Fawwaz.




Things i've been doing at home, briefly:

- woken up by Fawwaz because he wanted me to play the dikir barat cd which my dad bought at pasar malam. But it's okay, since i get 3morning kisses. wahahaha


- stayed up late at nights; watch tv series, novel reading

- try to stay at home as much as possible since most of my buddies are not in KB


- went for a bowling with Ammar, Miss Die and her friends


- went to my aunties houses


- taught by my brother on his trick to kick a ball


- thrown a bunch of keys at my face. Fawwaz did it out of sudden. grrr. I actually felt as if my nose is broken, but it's not. But hey, it's bleed. huhu :'(


- went to KL with my mom, my sis Yaya and Fawwaz for a shop!


- and i tried as much as i can to...avoid thinking. haha



At the end of the holiday...


- I have a new cousin

- Fawwaz missed me since there's no one to play the dikir barat cd anymore. poor him. but no worries, i'll be back again, SOON!

- i have two broken relationships, which i want to stop thinking and pondering over about it. Sam was right i should just get over it. I still have her, and LOTS of other people with me.


I can hardly share with people about my emotions, what i feel down under. And perhaps i was right. Because when you trust someone and you open up to them, then the next day they turn their back and just walk away, that is such a big dissappointment.

I want to click the refresh button. A new sem, new block, new spirit(hoho), plus with a new haircut, i would like to start over.

Live and learn.
A brand new me! :)